Mindfulness June Challenge [2]

Question: What am I attached to?
I drew: Mending

I am attached to holding on to pain by not fully understanding it and allowing myself to learn from it. I think I have forgiven and moved on for it to come back again at a later time. It is time to mend things for good, for my peace of mind. To heal myself.
How to do this properly is going to be a learning curve and I am sure a lot of inner work and meditation is due.


Well, after 2 days of pain and cramps all because of coffee, it needs to definitely be removed from my life.
No more trying one cup and seeing if I will be ok.

I do have Irritable Bowel Syndrome, I was diagnosed with that 15 years ago so I know what triggers me and so on.
However things have moved up a gear and just lately I can’t even handle just one cup of coffee before I am being ill a couple of hours later and for the next few hours after that.

Something has changed and I know the biggest change in my life has been learning Reiki and experiencing changes of all kinds – emotional, mental, spiritual and now physical.
I believe this is helping me to finally take notice of the changes my body is desperately trying to get me to take notice and act on it and finally make the changes.

One friend keeps saying how I am losing weight even though my eating habits are a long way off being how I need them to be yet and continue to give in to my junk food cravings like salty foods, crisps and carbs, sugar.

So I will be listening to my body more now – and acting on it’s messages.
Any food or drink that makes me ill will now be removed completely, like coffee, with no sneaking it back in just to test myself.
As time goes on I will tackle my other weaknesses but for now first things first.


When it hurts….

Last night I was laying in bed and fretting about work as I normally do when my mind was taken to what has happened to my career over the past few months and I was hit by grief. I felt utter sadness and pain at the loss of stability and happiness.
I didn’t know what to do with myself but instead of blocking it out and distracting myself I decided to really feel the sensations my body was having.
I allowed myself to feel my heart, throat and solar plexus – the heaviness and the pull. The unexplainable sensations were felt deeply and completely….

And then I called on the Angels and asked them for help…….. my breathing slowed
and then the pain was gone, I felt peace and my mind was calm.
I slept well.

Thank you Angels x


The Message of the Pelican

Yesterday, I opened my Symbol dictionary randomly and twice on the PELICAN, so I am assumed there is a message there =)

“Self-sacrificing love – a symbolism based on an old legend that pelicans tore their breasts to draw blood to feed their young. The earliest Christian bestiary drew an analogy between the pelican’s reviving it’s young with its blood and Christ’s shedding his blood for human kind. The pelican sometimes appears in Crucifixion paintings with this meaning, and can represent Charity in still life’s and filial devotion in heraldry. It represents Christ’s human nature when paired with the phoenix.”


Today I have also found the Pelican in my Power Animal Card deck by Steven D. Farmer;


“Let Go of your judgements”

“Each time you judge yourself, or others, you immediately create the illusion of separation – separation from your environment, from other human beings , and most critically, separation from the Creator and all of creation. Immersing yourself in the illusion creates pain that manifests as hurt, anger or even attack in words or deed. And if you stop and reflect, you’ll find what you judge in others is really a projection of a shadow aspect of yourself. Therefore, the source of these judgements is not just contained in the other – it’s something in yourself that you may not be aware of.
Once  you realize how judgements separate, there’s an opportunity to forgive – first, the transgressions or shortcomings,  then yourself as you identify the shadow aspect in you that you had projected on this individual. In the light of this realization, all illusion of separation  vanishes. This is  true forgiveness – not an empty mantra you repeat over and over again in order to support some false notion of forgiveness, but a genuine release of any and all judgements. When you’ve  forgiven, this act returns you to a state of love, acceptance and peacefulness.
You’ll know when this has happened because you’ll feel the natural and tranquil state of unity with the Creator and all of creation.”