Well, after 2 days of pain and cramps all because of coffee, it needs to definitely be removed from my life.
No more trying one cup and seeing if I will be ok.

I do have Irritable Bowel Syndrome, I was diagnosed with that 15 years ago so I know what triggers me and so on.
However things have moved up a gear and just lately I can’t even handle just one cup of coffee before I am being ill a couple of hours later and for the next few hours after that.

Something has changed and I know the biggest change in my life has been learning Reiki and experiencing changes of all kinds – emotional, mental, spiritual and now physical.
I believe this is helping me to finally take notice of the changes my body is desperately trying to get me to take notice and act on it and finally make the changes.

One friend keeps saying how I am losing weight even though my eating habits are a long way off being how I need them to be yet and continue to give in to my junk food cravings like salty foods, crisps and carbs, sugar.

So I will be listening to my body more now – and acting on it’s messages.
Any food or drink that makes me ill will now be removed completely, like coffee, with no sneaking it back in just to test myself.
As time goes on I will tackle my other weaknesses but for now first things first.



How to achieve Justice?


Sometimes I sit and read things, like the Sunday Mirror (UK) supplement magazine “Justice on Trial” and find myself getting angry at how things are in this country. How the public have to fund something we don’t always agree with and often despair of and complain about. Our opinions and voices do not matter to those who have power and make decisions.

I find myself reading this supplement and thinking yes that is terrible and disgraceful and clearly does not work as it is.
There is an odd comment in there by a QC, how we have been lied to about the cost of legal aid and he hopes we would take to the streets in anger and outrage, not only is his comment unhelpful, what good would it do?

Like all moaning and b!tching, it gets us nowhere.
Its all well and good stating what is wrong with the world and how terrible it is but I want to know how it can be improved, I want paths of action, ways to contribute. I want to know what will work and sadly, this supplement does not address this for the average individual, the average person who is not in the know, does not know the ways of this minefield that is the system.

If we want change, how is the best way to go about it? What can be done?

I asked my cards: “How can we fight for justice?”

I received:
Imagination, Awaken, Silence & Act

In life we encounter difficulties, it challenges us to think outside the box, use our Imagination and go far beyond our limits. We need to Awaken to different possibilities, be open to what they may be and then look for signs to guide us. In our Silence and meditation we will connect, we will receive the answers, ways & opportunities that we can Act on. When faith and action are combined we have the power to charge forward.
To help bring change.


Hard Truths…… still there

I am at a point in my life where I am stuck on one thing. One thing that affects all else, like a domino effect.

Losing weight.
Not to look good but to balance my hormones. To stop the ugly effects of Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. To hopefully conceive again.

Losing weight is not easy contrary to what some people think, say and judge about it. It is not just about dropping weight and not being greedy. It is more than that – it is about change long held beliefs, learned behaviour, and re-programming emotional coping mechanisms – how is that easy?

It is daunting and means coming out of my comfort zone and confronting things I have pushed into my subconscious. I am scared and overwhelmed.
And this discomfort is what I have to embrace in order to move on and change everything I know, everything I currently am.

Same Old, Same Old

The same old, same old.
It has not left me.

But have I really tried?

Have I really committed to change?


Plainly and simply I have not tried. Not truly.

Just brushed it under the carpet.

Pretending I can do better next time. Laying dormant, sleeping.

And next time comes and it’s still there. It rears it ugly head, grows and grows until it explodes.

I know it, I feel it and then I don’t care and don’t even bother to stop it.

It explodes and leaves devastation, perhaps even consequences I am even unaware of.

Unhealthy for all.


It will go on and on. If I let it.

I have the power to stop it.

I truly do.

One day I will use my heart and my brain together.

One day I will change because I realise I can’t do it this way any more.

I am too tired doing it this way.

I feel exhausted at my way all the time, even when I am at supposed peace.

I still feel that tiredness even now.

That day is coming. I know it is.

My reaction to the same old, same old is going to change.

Because in my heart I am ready.






My Polycystic Ovary Syndrome Action Plan

It’s no good. I have to face it and accept it.
I have to confront the fact I must work extremely hard to make changes.
Sitting here moaning and making excuses does NOT work.
My current way does NOT work full stop.

If I want to lose weight and change my body shape I have to put the effort in.
If I want to get pregnant and treat my Polycystic Ovary Syndrome I have to lose weight, exercise and eat healthily.
A magic fairy will not come along say “there, there”, wave her wand and grant me my wishes!

I am going to have pull my socks up and get on with it. I am going to unlearn all the habits and laziness I have instilled in me.
I WILL motivate myself and bull doze my way through change!!

A radical change is needed. It will be healthy and balanced. Back to basics.

I know raw food works for me – I once brought my periods back because of it.
I know water is good for me.
The Japanese food lifestyle also . . . .

I have looked up the healthiest nation in the world and Japan comes either top or very near the top so this nation has something I can learn from. Their life expectancy is the best in the world and obesity is rare.
So here I come; oily fish – omega 3 oil – for optimum brain function (seeing as the brain controls hormones this can only be great news for PCOS) , ginger to lower cholesterol, green tea – antioxidants, seaweed – high levels of minerals, protein and vitamin A/B12 & C, white rice (short grain Japanese variety) is high in nutrients and fills you up (may substitute it with brown rice mind you), soy – not so sure about this one but is high in protein, low in fat and lowers BP/cholesterol, large amounts of vegetables – eek! better find the ones I like and more importantly smaller portions.
I will welcome you to my life and body =)

I also found this on my travels. . . It is a paragraph from a woman’s blog, a woman who has suffered and treated her PCOS, even eliminated it through sheer hard work and incorporates many of the Japanese diet elements and physical exercise. . .

So….what can help women with PCOS, aside from medications with possible harmful side effects that can lead to other problems?  Proper diet and exercise!  Go figure!  I worked my butt off, both literally and figuratively, everyday and still do.  I pay attention to everything I put in my mouth.  I read labels, I shop only the perimeter of the grocery stores, I limit my carbs to whole grains, I cut out red meat, I eat A LOT of vegetables, I don’t add salt to anything, and I drink A LOT of water.  I work out at least 6 days a week.  I have dropped 70 pounds through hard work and eating clean.  My PCOS symptoms are gone, I am off all medication, and I now have, not 2, but 3 beautiful boys!  I cannot stress enough how diet and exercise are the game changers and the only real way to combat this disease.”



Serpentine and Mookaite

These are two crystals which have made themselves known to me in one way or another, although I have yet to buy a piece of each.


This is found in a dream – I “knew” it was Serpentine even though I had no idea what it looked like, or what it’s properties were.

This stone is an exceptional meditation stone, it will assist one in finding inner peace, as well as clearing the mind to become closer with oneself, but it should be reinforced with jade or chrysoprase to temper the energy.

Although Serpentine is known for its kundalini awakening... other Serpentine properties make it a very useful stone.

Elemental beings may be encouraged to make contact with you and using this stone may also aid you to make contact with angelic guidance.

It will even out the moods and calm the wearer when in stressful or hectic situations.

It is an excellent stone for cellular regeneration and to assist with healing problems within the heart and lungs. It may also aid healing of diabetes as well as eliminate parasites, and assisting it’s wearer to better absorb both magnesium and calcium.

In ancient civilizations, serpentine was used as a talisman, it was said to protect against demonic powers as well as promoting fertility. It is still used to protect against snake bites, poison and magic spells. In China and India it is quite often incorporated into altars, carvings and temple decorations, as it is seen as a protective stone that will bring peace.

This stone is an ancient stone… and it resonates within those ancient reptilian areas of the brain. It will aid you to rewire your brain… and it may aid you to let go of any aggression you might be feeling. Combine it with Seraphinite for this use, as it is an excellent combination.

Information from the following website;


I love the colours of this stone and for some reason found it another perfect stone for me;

Mookaite is a nurturing stone that supports and sustains during times of stress. It brings peace and a feeling of wholeness. Mookaite helps us with decision making, especially when we are having a difficult time. It encourages versatility and helps us to accept change. Mookaite provides us with emotional growth. It helps us to discover all possibilities in a situation and to choose the right one. Mookaite provides a protective shield against negative or dangerous situations, eliminating and blocking unwanted outside influences and distractions, and. revealing what is concealed.  Mookaite promotes energy and new ideas, helping us gain enthusiasm and bringing the excellence of ourselves, bring kindness to ourselves and others. Mookaite helps with contacting those who have passed on.

Mookaite stabilises the general health of the whole body and strengthens the immune system.